Overdose!

Knowing we were skipping out on about 10% of our New Zealand visa threw a wrench in our travel style. Suddenly we were anxious about having time to see and do everything we wanted to do. We switched into hardcore mode, and hit the road. We tackled the entire West Coast in nine days- an area that typically would have taken us three weeks. I suspected our frantic pace couldn’t last, and I was right.

We made it through three trips, and four bouts of sightseeing before crashing. It happened after our unremarkable Wangapeka hike. The plan was to follow up our West Coast explorations with a long backcountry trip in the renowned Nelson-Lakes area. We arrived in St. Arnaud — staging ground for the region — completely exhausted, cold, and cranky. We checked into a hostel and I never wanted to leave. For three days I felt like a total schmuck – sitting on the doorstep of stellar New Zealand wilderness with absolutely zero desire to go backpacking. I had officially OD’d on nature.

I attached my computer to my hip and spent the days consuming hot drinks, strolling down to the lake, and lamenting my apathy. I knew this would be the last weekend of snow-free hiking in the mountains. Unfortunately, nearly 48 hours of vegetating didn’t cure me. Having completed all our chores (van dishes, laundry, etc), we had no excuse to continue spending money to sit around indoors. Faced with zero desire to sight-see or hike, we cursed our choice to eliminate farm work exchanges  (wwoofing) from our lifestyle. Wwoofing enriches our lives in a multitude of ways, and it was ridiculous to give it up in the name of being sure we’d see and do everything on our bucket lists. A week spent wwoofing with a well-chosen New Zealand family is just as memorable and fun as a hiking trip or time spent sightseeing.

Unable to stomach more time in the trees, we headed for the nearest concrete jungle — the city of Nelson. 45,000 residents enjoy the sunniest weather in the country. We scouted out items worthy of our to-do list and finally got to see Super 8. Different than I expected, but good movie! We also took strolls around parks, wound our way up to the geographical center of New Zealand, shopped at the Farmer’s Market, checked out the flea market, ate a year’s worth of creamy bleu cheese, went wine and beer tasting, and treated ourselves to pizza and ice cream! My favorite “wine” educational moment was learning about how the amount of foliage cover, the timing of picking, and the effects of rain on the grapes change qualities in the wine.

The Nelson area is the bread basket of the south island and also grows and exports world-famous hops. Local brewers craft some amazing products, and one provided us with an entire afternoon of free entertainment. He’s a retired rough-and-tumble former mechanic whose “Cheeky Little Lager” label is a woman’s bikini-clad backside. I was shocked to return from the loo to find the first ‘taste’ was a 10o.z. glass filled to the brim! This guy – a self proclaimed ‘piss-head’ – loves to have drinking buddies. A fountain of profanity and politically-incorrect comments flowed from him for the hours we spent tasting. Wow!

Nelson is by far the most friendly place we’ve experienced in New Zealand. We even met a Kiwi friendly enough to pass as a midwestern American! Coincidence that she spent a summer working at Disneyworld? We also met some awesome folks at “The Playhouse.” We were treated to five one-act plays in a fascinating straw-bale turned theater-cave. While the maturity of the content was surprising given the majority of entries were in the youth (high school) category, they were pretty well done!

For our final night in Nelson, we checked into “The Palace” a hostel in a cool, giant old Victorian with lots of character. We made a giant warm stew and spent the evening watching movies. Finally, we were off for our final adventure before making our super-secret-stealth journey back to the states!

Photos of NZ cultural hilariousness, a child at an ATM, and more by clicking here!