The First Epic Patterson Christmas

Some lapse of sanity caused me to purchase twenty five pounds of satsuma mandarins from a weekly food buying program in Arizona. At a pound a day, they’d last a month. And so it’s no surprise that a week after I flew out of bed and into my dad’s Honda Element to pick them up, I found myself on the patio juicing my heart out while waiting for smoke from the oven cleaning to clear the house.

A few weeks later, after my sister Jerrica graduated from nursing school, after she and her son Kyler flew with my parents and I back to Arizona, after my sister Jeana and her son Izziah and Mark flew in from Casper, after my uncle Rik hopped a plane from Denver, after my uncle Tim and his entourage drove over from California, and after my grandmothers covered the few miles between their houses and my parents’, I broke out the frozen mandarin juice. It was Christmas Eve, my nephew and I had just finished a sun bathing session in the backyard under the desert sun, my mom and Jerrica and I had squeezed in a workout, and one of many card game was in full swing at the kitchen table. Let me be the first to tell you, mandarin mimosas are sublime. When the bubbles ran out, the vodka made an acceptable substitute until we’d consumed every drop of the juice. A few hours later, we held my favorite Christmas tradition — a crab crack! My father cooked up at least as many pounds of king crab as I had juiced mandarins, and we crammed ourselves full of the sweet, succulent, buttery bits of heaven that take so much work to extract.

Christmas Eve wasn’t the only fun bit. This particular gathering has been on the books for years – the first of many to come. My sisters, parents, and I had all carved out two weeks in December to spend together. We’ll do it again in 2016. The time flew by, full of general milling about, excessive eating, joyfully prolific consumption of alcoholic beverages, and… rollercoasters! My nephews are six and eight (and I’m probably five-at-heart) — the perfect age that provides and excuse for the whole family to unbridle their inner child. We drove over to southern California’s mecca of amusement parks and spent three days seeing the sights at Universal Studios, riding simulators and long-drops, taking in the shows, and being tossed around and into the air by the various rides at Knott’s Berry Farm. The six year old was always terrified as we stood in line listening to the screams of the riders ahead of us. We had to convince him to get on every single rollercoaster, but he came off of each one clapping his hands and talking excitedly about loving “the really steep go-downs.”

I hope our next all-family session is full of just as much fun and excellent food (pork green chili, mahi mahi, chicken noodle soup, sushi, grilled shrimp, tamales…. mmmm) and maybe fewer screens. Let’s get outside! ♣